What Matters

Art by Anna Salzmann

Grief is the ultimate reminder of what matters. It tears out attention away from all the frivolous stuff we normally waste time on, forcing us to confront our basic need for connection. 

‘What Matters’ is one of the liveliest and most upbeat on my forthcoming album Life Through Loss. It’s a depiction of the happy times, the times that make life worth living, and grief worth enduring. 

Earlier this month my family and I commemorated the tenth anniversary of my Mum’s death. Those of you who know the story know that her death wasn’t an easy time, nor was it an ‘easy’ death (if there is such a thing).

It would be very easy to focus on the negatives, but it is precisely for that reason that it’s important for me to emphasise the positive sides of my Mum’s life — her kindness, her sense of humour. I loved that about her, and I love it when those parts of her show up in my personality even now.

‘What Matters’ is about that: it’s about focusing on the positives we take from those we’ve lost. That’s why I have embedded her initials in the music. You may not be able to hear it, but she’s everywhere in this music, brightening it. 

I hope that, if you’ve experienced grief, you’ve also felt these positives. If not, I encourage you to think about any good times you had with the person you’ve lost, and what you loved about them. What of that goodness lives on in you? How can you share their best sides with the world? If these prompts are challenging, please write to me — I would be happy to talk it through with you.